Taco Night

Saturday, July 26, 2014

10:15 PM
Now Playing: Styx - Renegade 

I can’t lose. That’s how I am feeling. Maybe it’s because just now, it felt like a light bulb lit up when Pat said, “We can’t lose.” about her and Geoff. 

I admire them both as individuals and as a couple. First of all, they’ve been married for 20 years… That’s amazing in itself. They both have their own identities… but they are still so in sync. Don’t get me wrong, I am no relationship aficionado but I honestly believe that couples are stronger when they both know exactly who they are without one another. You have to know how to get lost in loving someone else without losing yourself. 

I think I am ready to do that with Bae. 


11:27 PM

Everyone around me is laughing right now at the International Air Sex Competitions.

“Is that a whoopy cushion?!” Curtis is so silly... But his question really made me look up from my MacBook and start paying attention. 

“Oh my gosh!!!” Siobhan yelled in disgust. 

“Ohhhhh … I get it!” The entire room laughed at Querin's reaction to the pink-haired, frail white boy on stage, spraying whipped cream all over his own face.
This is: The weirdest thing ever.


I can see my own reflection on this retina screen. It has been about 20 minutes and I am still smiling at Bae’s last text. That man really knows what to say to give me that electrifyingly giddy feeling throughout my entire body. I love him.

I aint mad at myself for falling kinda fast either. I mean, I know it’s only day 8.. but why does it have be “only”.. What is the deal with there being a time limit on love? How can people determine the amount of time it takes to know that you love some one? I think I should ask the experts. I am going to ask the people in this room. After all, they’re all married. 

“It’s different for everybody.” Geoff started to explain. “Everybody falls in love at different times, sometimes it hits you in the end and sometimes it starts right at the top. It all depends on the people.”

Great! Just what I thought. Love just happens when it is supposed to happen. 

I looked over at Querin, whom I knew was going to give me a great answer. 

"Interesting that you ask me that. Back in the day, I was dating this guy and I told him I loved him after 3 days. I told him, Hey, relax.. I am just saying that I love you for what I know.. I can find other things to love tomorrow. I mean its easy for me to tell someone I love them on the first day that I meet them, because I do... and because I love myself." Querin is like the town love doctor of the group. She always knows what she knows, what she knows. 

As I listened to Querin, I couldn't help but notice Siobhan showing a different kind of love to Jimmy Dean, her Pekingese. And it dawned on me that love is really nothing more than the most intense form of happiness. It's whatever and whoever makes you h a p p y. 

let me stop being an introvert and get back to the party....