Showing posts from September, 2014

12:14 AM

"Bae.." I said.. "I'm about to take a quick nap to relax my mind. Then pull an all nighter for this paper. I hate when I do this to myself. Almost wish I didn't take this course this semester. I knew I was going to be moving. Putting too much on my plate is sometimes a downfall for me but I was procrastinating, instead of packing and starting this paper.. Which is an even bigger issue than me taking on too many responsibilities. October 1st , I'm going start my daily activity list. Today, September 30th, 2014, is the last day that I allow myself to bullshit."
"Stick to the script.", he said. "Don't overwhelm yourself." 

5 Minute Reflection

Even if you're known for being great, some people still just won't like you - so just be great. 
When things fall apart, buy something new. Fixing the same old broken thing is pointless, it's eventually going to just break again. (Figuritively speaking.)
Everyone tells you they love you but only a select few know how to show you that they love you. Cherish those folk. They really, really love you. 
When you lose something, it's just the Universe's way of sending you a new. 
Plant your seeds for the future in all that you do. Just remember that you never harvest in the season that you sew in.. Patience is a virtue.

What Would You Title This?

June 2008
"Val, where are my Delia's jeans that I let you borrow when you were moving your things into Alyse's basement?" Nikki hit me on AIM. 
"I left them in her living room by the chair. They should be in the corner." I texted back. 
"Alyse? She got evicted. There are no jeans in her living room. There's nothing there. You didn't know that she got evicted last week?" 
"Wait.. What?!" 
I put my sidekick down and picked up my pink razor phone, immediately calling Alyse to figure out what was going on. What Nikki was telling me had to have been a mistake. 
"Alyse.. You got evicted?" 
"Yea. Why?"
"Ummm.... What about my things that I left in your house? Why didn't you call me? Don't they give you a 30 day notice when you get evicted? When I put my stuff there last week, you knew this was going to happen?" I was frantic. I'd just graduated from Morgan. My lease at Dutch Village…

Sunday Jewels

His soft lips pressed against mine one last time as he headed up the steps to sit on the top floor of the double-decker Megabus. It was about 6:45 and the sun was rising, reflecting on the clouds to create shades of pinks and purples that made me smile, even though my heart was sullen. 
We usually spend our Sunday's exploring, laughing, and loving but today, he had to get back to Manhattan. He has a big photo shoot at noon in the city, yet, he still found a way to send me the most beautiful pink and yellow sunflowers this morning. Starting my week off with flowers and gifts from him has become a Sunday ritual. And the surprise never gets old because he always catches me off guard with the way he presents them. It's so thoughtful that I just had to ask, 
"Bae, why do you get me flowers every Sunday?"
"Because when we first started dating, you once mentioned how you buy yourself Sunday flowers every week. You have a man now. You don't have to buy your own flowers…

One Man's Trash is Another Man's Treasure

Tonight, I will be giving the items in the pictures below away. This is a first come first serve basis. Please read the captions carefully, so that you will not be let down if you come and find out that the item you wanted is not included in the give-away. There are a couple of pairs of shoes and coats that are not in the pictures that will be included in the give-away.
I will be starting at 6PM and ending promptly at 9PM. If you'd like to join me in a toast at 8PM, please do. Cheers to one man's trash being another's treasure! 

I'm Fired.

"Always remember, not to be selfish. The pathway to receiving is to give."  Bettye Perkins
7:47 PM
Shannell inspired me to take a break in the middle of the week. It's funny because Geoff and I were just talking about feeling antsy about being in our seventh year of teaching, needing a sabbatical but not wanting to take one because we're too deeply invested in sewing seeds into our students.. 
It was really a vent about needing a break. Personally, I've been feeling flustered. I mean not that I am complaining but ever since I got a man, my schedule has been even more hectic than before. 
I'm working in school with my babies, outside of school with my Hopkins coursework, my PHD fellowship research, Blossoms, PYNK, and Tay (can't forget Tay) ... And now I've added the job of being a future wife to my list of to-do's. Seriously, I write, "Tell Bae how much you love him..." in my planner! 
Again, I'm not complaining. I love my life and I love…

3:19 AM

3:19 AM
I don't sleep pass 3 anymore. Every morning I wake up and just lay here thinking about things. 
I'm supposed to be moving. It's a bittersweet feeling. This has been my home for seven years. It's hard to just get up and leave. Maybe if I sell everything, it will feel less like home..and then I won't feel as somber about leaving my comfort zone.

Silent Lovers

I always ruin the mood.
Sitting on this train ride, I'm reflecting on our conversation today and I feel bad. Sometimes I say things or ask questions that come out the wrong way but they aren't meant to hurt you. They are simply inquiries. I can't say sorry enough for making you feel as if something is wrong with you. Me asking you that question easily sounded like it was centered around you, but it wasn't. To be honest, you are flawed, but you know what - those same qualities are what I love about you and I accept them. I don't want to be in relationship with a woman who always agrees and doesn't challenge me. Embracing that you are somewhat difficult at times and emotional is okay with me. I understand all of that and I soak all of you in because there is beauty in all of you. If you haven't noticed, I grow and feed off of you. When you're sad, I'm sad, when you're happy, I'm happy. We're so connected and alike when you pay close attenti…

Thursday Night Reflection

Felt like crying today in our team meeting about one of my students whose parents abuse him, even though he has a severe disability. What really hit home was hearing about how his mom was using drugs while she was pregnant with him. I remember when my mom admitted that she was so addicted to crack that she couldn't stop using it, even though she was pregnant with me. I don't have a physical disability but I often wonder if my cognitive functioning skills were affected by her poor pre-natal care. Like, what's wrong with me that I can't actually see? Or am I totally fine? I don't know .. What I do know is that I am blessed to have been able to overcome her neglectful parenting. But my heart cries for my students who have to suffer because of their parents. I wish I could do more to help them. 

Bae and I had an argument this morning and it was heavy on my mind after the meeting. I was about to walk to the park and sit under my favorite tree to clear my head before my t…

Khalil Gibran on Marriage

Let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

The Moral of the Story Is: ______ ?

"How do you even wipe your butt with those things?!" It annoys me when people say something about my really long nails. They were only  that long because my favorite nail shop has been closed the last two times that I went to them and I don't let just anyone file my nails. Tonight, my shop was closed again and I had to resort to getting them done at another shop, which I have only frequented maybe once or twice since living in Baltimore. 
I took a risk and let the elder Vietnamese woman attempt to cut and file my nails. I adored her jet-black, blunt cut bob. I trusted her because of her great hair and to my dismay, she did a horrible job on my nails. I was pissed but I didn't complain, I simply asked her for the nail-file and began to fix each one of them myself. 
I guess I was taking a longer time filing than she expected because the owner of the shop came over and rudely asked me, "What shape you want?! I fix for you!" 
"No, thank you." I said. &quo…