Efflorescent Memoirs

July 27th, 2017 2:34PM
Vallejo, CA

It was July 16th. A beautiful Sunday in Downtown, LA. Tahra and I walked into Dante's studio and I realized I left my make-up bag at home. I'll just put on my ruby woo and brush my 26 Malaysian inches out. Should be fine. "No. I want to shoot you, as you are." I didn't even know him like that. Agreed to be his muse for the day because, well, earlier this year when Alex asked me to send her a picture for the Hey, Girl podcast, I was embarrassed that the only pictures I had of myself were in my classroom. It was indicative of my current social life: I never go anywhere anymore. My school year is all about school. Summer? I was so busy writing and reading and publishing Soundless Cries last summer... I hadn't had a real summer break since Cuba. And even then, I hadn't really taken any pictures of myself. So every photo-op that I got this summer was a yes. I don't want to look back on my life and only remember myself as wor…

*Notes from Facebook: I am not a good black woman I am a good woman. I am not a good black teacher I am a good teacher. I am not a good black writer I am a good writer. I do not care who agrees/understands why I am choosing to push solidarity now, after years of pushing pro-blackness. I am evolving. I cannot focus on who understands. I can only focus on what's important: matching my beliefs with my actions. It is not my responsibility to persuade anyone to follow, it is only important that I am true to self. I want to see peace. I understand what it takes: rethinking your own biases and challenging yourself enough to grow. Love always. Heal self first. Then, work on your communities.
Her experience is very common. In fact, when attending Hopkins, I asked a professor about the PhD program and she gave me the same reaction that this young lady is describing. Like it killed her to offer guidance on anything that would advance our community. Not posting this to lash out on any teacher …