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Showing posts from October, 2019

7:37

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Stretching myself and growing in so many different ways at once was the challenge, this month. 
I just realized this during my meditation. 
Tonight, I am setting new self-care goals for November. 
Thank you for allowing me to be a human.  







8:16

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I asked my advisory if they had a million dollars, what would they do with it and where would they get it from. To answer the second question, most said "rob a bank, rob trump, or hit the lottery." At what age is it appropriate to start helping them see how lucrative their future can be? When do we teach them how to acquire generational wealth? All of them said they would use the money to "buy a house." When do we teach them to buy land or buildings?




7:29

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I just paid my tuition for fall out of pocket. I turned down a McDonald’s ad that would’ve covered my whole year because...
Anyways, I was pissed about dipping into my savings but then, I realized just being able to pay it needs to be celebrated. There are many that cannot and I certainly could not have a few years ago. There are so many other desires I could have invested in but I chose my education, with the intention of making it so my children and beyond never have to choose between their desires, again. 




10:17

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stopped posting videos because my classroom became my show. By winter 2019, I realized, my social media ratings were greater than my students’ results. Don’t get me wrong, this is not about standardized test data as a measure of growth. This is about my students not just reading words but deeply comprehending them enough to use texts as weapons against injustice. Yes, I went there. I still have the same agenda, to free minds, that I’ve had since the beginning. The lessons I was sharing were not impacting the literacy difficulties among students with ADHD, anxiety, and depression in my classroom. I was teaching but I was still not reaching my students with disabilities or moving them beyond the barriers keeping them from learning. 
Getting into a doctoral program came at the perfect time. It led me to begin asking why I was not successful in serving all of my students.As I found causes for adolescent illiteracy in urban districts in my research, I found statistics that revealed the star…

5:28

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My students wear their puffs just like mine, or maybe I wear mine like their’s. 
I love it. 
Today, I found out I earned an A on my sociology paper that I was stressed about! Really feeling myself. 
Celebrating by sitting in the park, watching the birds dance with the leaves. It’s nice to be at peace and fully caught up. 


5:29

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Paper 1: Submitted 1 week late.  Paper 2: Submitted 1 day late.  Paper 3: Submitted on the day it was due...which is today :)
Goal for Paper 4: Submit 1 day before it’s due. 
I know I can because I am truly growing from week to week. It’s hard but it’s worth it! The speed of my reading comprehension is increasing. I am finishing articles in 30-45 minutes—used to take at least 1 day about a month ago. I think I’ll stay committed to strengthening my reading skills before I begin practicing my writing because I know reading will naturally improve my writing.  
This process makes me lean deeply into my work as a teacher. I realize how much I need and how much I have to give to myself to push through this work. My students need me to not only be this for them, they need me to teach them how to be this for themselves. 


3:23

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I fell asleep so many times in the last 3 hours. I keep waking up on the same page. 
I’m not giving up though. 
Why is it easier to stay up and binge a show on Netflix than it is for me to read, silently? 
This is the same science that I am exploring to understand among urban youth but I see I have to start with myself, first. 


9:36

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these corporations don’t see me as an educational activist. they don’t care about my commitment to banning the idea of their being an achievement gap. 
all they see is the numbers. they are not reaching out with 10K to support my students in getting iPads. they are asking me to promote some sh’t and they don’t care what I do with the money they give... 
our economically disadvantaged students need more than ad money, they need abundant, adequate resources. 
that is what my platform is for ...

im reading faster than ever
my writing will improve soon, too because i started journaling ...



9:35

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I haven't implemented a Reading Apprenticeship Strategy, yet, this school year. 
But I read those questions and felt moved. 
I need to choose at least one question to hone my action-research study on... 
I am grateful to be able to collect real time data that helps to inform my practice. 
Grateful for having a picture of this anchor chart of questions in my photos. 



8:25

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Sometimes I hear your thoughts in my head and I feel afraid of what you think of me. 
But as I write these lesson plans for my 8th grade girls, I realize I need to be less concerned with my assumptions and more focused on my creativity. 
Refocusing my energy to where it best serves my ability to be a servant leader. 
Colorful stories I make up are not real. The girls’ need to become critical thinkers is ... they need me to be in good spirits. 
Dear Mind, 
Focus on your focus.

3:42

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Turned down another ad today. 
Needed the money but I don’t want to endorse brands and companies I don’t believe in, just for the money. 
I’ll find another way to pay for school. 
I know I will. 


7:24

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Today is better. 
I am caught up in both of my classes. 
I feel so good. 
Spending the night planning for my students, I love that work, I almost forgot how much I love developing lessons. 

Grateful.

10:55

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I need to read this book and see if I can find myself ... so much going on in my head right now. Grateful to one of my professors for reaching out with a quote about mindset. 
But I’m still not progressing...

I will not quit. 
I can do this.  
I can. 
I am. 

8:27

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Took that weave out.  
My scalp wanted to breathe. 
First blow out in 18 months. 
Over thinking. 
Overcoming 
negative thoughts. 
I am. 


9:56PM — I’m Behind in the Readings

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If you came here for the rest of the video I posted on my IG, you’ll have to forgive me. I lured you here just to tell you that you’ll have to wait on it because I am not coming back to social media until I have my sh’t together. 
I’m doing way too much. 
This email from my professor says it all: 

Teaching.  Nat Geo.  Keynotes.  Leading staff.  Being a human with a personal life. 
It’s heavy and I am NOT going to drop this course or fail as a result of continuing to juggle all my responsibilities. I just want to teach and go to school. Nat Geo is aligned with teaching but keynotes and social media are not, at this time. But full disclosure, if you see me post any ads on my stories, know that I need the money for school. Not taking out any loans, paying out of pocket, ads help tremendously. But other than that, I gotta stay out of my own way and stay caught up on the readings. 
I posted the videos on IG just to let you know, I am collecting classroom footage  but I am not curating  until I get my …

dc bound

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Purposely left this goodie home. Triggers me. 

Finding myself feeling like an actress at times. Asking myself who I want to be in specific spaces. Myself said, “myself.”